How Your Parents ‘relationship Can Affect Your Love Life

Believe it or not, your parents’ relationship can intervene from the moment you choose a partner, or sooner. It is up to you what you take as an example and what you remove from your memories.

There is a theory that indicates that when looking for a partner it is more likely that that person is similar to one of our parents, both physically and in personality. And it is also said that it is because we need what is familiar to us. In this article we will tell you how your parents’ relationship affects your love life.

Therefore, it is not strange to think that depending on how your parents’ relationship is, it is how you are with your partner. Are we condemned to repeat mistakes? Or can we take advantage of the lesson so as not to do it in the future? We answer you below.

Your parents’ relationship says a lot about you

If you have grown up in a home where expressions of affection were not frequent, surely you are not a too demonstrative person. Or, if your family is to organize meetings and dinners for everyone, perhaps you will be an excellent host when you move, get married or receive people.

Everything we receive – or not – in our childhood reverberates in an amazing way in our adulthood. The traumas of that time are the most difficult to overcome and the beautiful memories, impossible to erase.

Did you know that our personality is forged from before we are born? It is said that depending on how the mother is during pregnancy, the baby will be in the future. For example, a very nervous woman will give birth to a restless child. Of course there are exceptions, but it is to understand how vulnerable we are to the actions of our parents.

This does not mean blaming them for everything that happens to us, but it does mean taking it into account when analyzing our attitudes or the way we do certain things. Because everything that has happened to us in childhood has left traces, many of them imperceptible until they ‘come to light ‘ and can influence our personal relationships.

Your parents’ relationship is your example

If your parents have divorced, does it mean that you too will go down that path? Not necessarily. But you do have to be careful about their behavior patterns that you follow in your relationship.

For example, if your father was not very affectionate with you, you may not like very much when your partner shows you his affection; Or if your mother was very overprotective, you may ‘turn’ your boyfriend into your son and fill him with attention that he does not request or that he considers unnecessary.

The relationship that your parents have (or that they had when you were little) is a reflection of your love relationships. Analyze it for a moment and say, with total sincerity, if there is not even one thing you do that reminds you of them.

It is natural that we look for what we feel familiar with, we cannot forget that man is an animal of habit. Changes terrify us, even if they are positive and make us better people.

The love relationship that we will seek then will be marked ‘on fire’ by the experience we have had with our parents. You may not have realized it, but there are many features of your partner that resemble those of one of your parents. And it is not always boyfriend-father or girlfriend-mother; sometimes the roles are switched.

Of course we ‘inherit’ the good and also the bad from those who have given us life and raised us. Therefore, it is up to us to know how to differentiate what we can keep and what is better to solve or treat.

Get the best out of your parents’ relationship

We recommend that you do an exercise, for which you must be as objective and honest as possible with yourself. The idea is that as a first step you make a list with everything you remember about your parents’ relationship when you were a child. You can separate it into positive and negative aspects to differentiate them.

Then, take each of those items and think if you are repeating it in your love story. If so, determine if it brings negative or positive consequences to your relationship. If they are beneficial, keep doing them; otherwise, do your best to banish them from your life.

Don’t feel like a prisoner of your parents’ actions; you have a unique possibility: to predict the future. If they are still together, take note of how they have done it. And if they have separated, also keep in mind their dealings, their words, their gestures or everything that led them to that situation.

You are only doomed to repeat the past if you do nothing to change it. You have all the tools at your disposal … And you know the end (or the present) of the story! You should not miss this opportunity.

Continue to apply the habits of your parents’ relationship that you think may work with your partner. And put aside the harmful attitudes that do not allow a happy future at your side.