5 Mistakes That Jealous People Make

Jealousy is one of the main causes of deterioration and subsequent breakdown of a relationship. It is important to keep them at bay before they control us.

Many people consider that being jealous is showing how much you love your partner. However, these types of feelings and attitudes are more related to insecurity and low self-esteem, as long as they are unfounded.

It is true that we have all felt them at some time. However, it must be clear that there are certain differences between being jealous in an unconscious and punctual way and toxic behavior that can destroy the other and oneself. 

These mistakes can cost the health, both physical and emotional, of the person who suffers them and deteriorate the relationship. Therefore, below we explain the most dangerous behaviors related to this problem.

Mistakes of jealous people in a relationship

Although most jealousy has to do with the person who experiences it and their fears, there are also some situations that are part of dysfunctional love games that determine how the members of the couple relate.

1. They absorb their partner and put pressure on them

Jealous people are very insecure and this causes them to try at all times to control their partner. They want it just for themselves. They can’t stand the idea that they can be interested in others.

This can cause the other person to feel very pressured and want some space in your relationship. Overwhelming your partner can lead to an unwanted ending: the breakup.

However, jealous people do not realize what the other is feeling. The reason is that his jealousy overrides his empathy and prevents him from connecting with the feelings of others.

2. They are in continuous search for evidence

There is something known as the Pygmalion effect and it indicates that if a person believes that something is going to happen or acts as if it did, in the end, it happens. This happens to jealous people who are continually looking for some sign that their partner is unfaithful to them.

Any message or contact with someone can trigger a discussion full of reproaches and phrases such as “ you don’t love me anymore! “. What happens is that these types of attitudes can eventually cause them to find what they were looking for.

3. They refuse to seek help

The negative part of jealousy and believing that it is normal or that it indicates love for the other person is that those who suffer it refuse to believe that they are a problem for their relationship. This causes enormous wear and tear on the couple. Also, over time, the relationship can become very toxic for both of you.

Seeking help would be a very positive thing. Thus, communication between the couple would improve and jealousy would come to be seen as unfounded beliefs and the result of fears and insecurities that have no reason for being.

4. Jealousy does not end overnight

As much as a jealous partner says ” I’m going to change, ” it’s not that easy. In fact, in most cases it is necessary to have the advice of a therapist.

Jealous people can make a variety of promises when their overwhelmed partner threatens to leave them. However, it must be borne in mind that the process will be long, since it is necessary to put an end to irrational beliefs and myths about love and jealousy.

5. They explode suddenly

Jealous people, due to their mistrust, are often in a bad mood. In addition, in the face of any small evidence, his jealousy comes to the fore, which generates a feeling of boredom in his partner. Many, in fact, begin to lie to the other to avoid those attacks of anger.

Other times, those who suffer from jealousy keep their emotions to themselves, which worsens the situation, since in the end it ends up exploding. The consequences of this, many times, are even dangerous.

The jealous person must change, for the good of both

It would be positive for jealous people to realize that the solution is not for their partner to act the way they want, but that they are the ones who have to change their view of the relationship and jealousy. Only then will they be able to maintain a healthy bond with the other.

Otherwise, in most cases, excessive jealousy will lead to breakup, as the situation will become untenable.